Shades of Honor (Grayson Brothers) by Wendy Lindstrom
Author:Wendy Lindstrom [Lindstrom, Wendy]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Tags: Historical Romance
Publisher: Rustic Studio Publishing
Published: 2010-12-21T00:00:00+00:00
* * *
Several hours later, Radford flopped upon his mattress searching for sleep, begging for it, wishing with all his soul that he could find peace in that black oblivion. But his eyes refused to stay closed and his mind continued to torment him with conversations that made his heart race.
The memory of his brothersâ guilty faces staring back at him made him ache. He hadnât been prepared for Kyleâs hurtful accusations. Radford could understand Kyleâs need to protect what heâd sweated over. No one knew better than Radford the fierce urge to protect, whether it be an inconsequential possession or his very life. Radford had learned survival during the war and that instinct had perched on his shoulders, sinking its long claws in too deeply to be removed.
But he was so weary of battling and fighting and running. All he wanted was to share his life with his family, to give Rebecca the happiness a little girl deserved, and to work at something he could take pride in. The profits at the mill didnât entice him. His years with the railroad had left him financially comfortable and he would have mentioned that to Kyle, but it dawned on him that the issue wasnât money, it was control. Kyle was more concerned with losing his position than sharing profits. Now, it was a moot point and didnât matter anymore.
Radford flipped his pillow and folded his arms behind his head. He concentrated on keeping his breathing even and encouraged his mind to turn away from the painful confrontation with his brothers. Think of good things, he told himself. Like the sound of Rebeccaâs giggle and the way her nose wrinkles when sheâs confused. Those thoughts made him smile and the knowledge that she was happy here comforted him.
It was because of Evelyn. Rebecca felt safe with her. But Radford didnât. Not by a mile.
He mulled over their problem, turning it in every possible direction, but the answer eluded him throughout the long hours of the night. By morning he was exhausted and thoroughly sick of agonizing over the emotions that were draining him. On the way into the kitchen, he stubbed his toe on Evelynâs chair and gave her a growl for a greeting.
âYou look tired,â she said.
âI am.â He poured a cup of coffee and took a gulp. The liquid scorched his throat and his eyes watered. âDammit!â
âDid you have another nightmare?â
After the incident with his brothers, Radford had heard enough references to his past. And though he despised the need to do it, he was resolved to end his personal bond with Evelyn. Today. He placed his cup in the sink and turned to face her. âI believe thatâs my business.â He forced himself to ignore her wounded expression, and he left the house.
Throughout the morning, despite his increasing shame, Radford treated Evelyn harshly. Shutting her out was the only way he was going to keep from betraying Kyle, and Radford couldnât do that when she was all sweetness and honey.
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